Day 2

I just read the passage Genesis 32:22-32. And my first thought...I really need to read from the beginning and up through the suggested passage. Because again I'm lost. SO, I'm going to start reading from the beginning. Once I am caught up and through this passage, I'll come back and try again. I wonder if it will explain why Jacob has two wives...

...

I'm not all the way caught up, but I have spent last night and most of today (when not busy with the kids) reading and I'm now up to Genesis 20.
I reread the passage, and looked over the notes again. Jacob wrestled with God and asked to be blessed. However it looks like in the back story that Jacob is wanting to make amends with his brother? Peacefully. It's asks if when placing myself in the story, who I would be. I can feel myself relating with Jacob, wanting to make peace with a former 'enemy' or whomever; I don't like having bad relationships with people, I want things to be good between me and everyone else. However, I can also imagine myself just being a bystander. I wouldn't be refusing to let God (or any other man) pass until they blessed me, and I would not wrestle with them. I avoid contact with others, avoid all violence...ya know. Just don't like it.

The 'Live' portion of this says to sit before God, imagining the night sounds and smell of running water, be comfortable with God in this atmosphere; to trust and reveal my desires of my heart...It's been raining all day and Jordan gets picked up in roughly 40 minutes, it was be past 1am, with my window open, listening to the rain and smelling the wet world, and I'm actually really looking forward to that darkness, trying to connect with God and talk to Him. Let him know how I'm feeling, what I want for myself, for our relationship...